If your first thought was, "Ok. It's a Snuggie. What's the big deal?" Then you, my friend, are an idiot. This is not a Snuggie. This is a Slanket.I repeat: This is a SLANKET.
I didn't realize it was humanly possible to get even more ghetto than the Snuggie, but, as I waited in line at Ross, I found I was mistaken.
Doesn't that look comfy?
Well, think again. I happen to own a Snuggie. It was a gift from a friend.
What a Snuggie really is, is a thin piece of felt that sheds all over any black or dark clothing you may be wearing. You need to rest your back against something warm and comfy, otherwise your back and neck will freeze. It makes you kind of clammy and gross feeling. There is this extra fabric that just hangs over your neck and back like loose foreskin or something. It's really an icky experience all around. Not only that, but in order to be considered a UNIVERSAL SIZE they had to make it seven feet long. That means you should never run (unless from zombies) in a Snuggie/Slanket. You will trip and faceplant.
Fuck you Snuggie.
And a double fuck you to the Slanket.
No comments:
Post a Comment