If you are offended by foul language, and particularly hate the word that begins with a 'C' and rhymes with 'front' I highly suggest you scroll down or click out of this post. Because it has to do with my laptop and the only word I can think to describe it is cunt. Because it is a cunt. The biggest cunt. If someone were to organize a list of the biggest cunts in history (and we all know who would round up the top five), my laptop would, for sure, be at five or six.
I have never in my life met something more evil and purposely hurtful in my entire life, and believe me, some of the girls I went to school with were right cunts. My laptop enjoys my annoyance and discomfort and has purposely shut down, shit out and fucked up just to piss. Me. Off.
Today, for example, I have been awake for a half hour and had to check on an assignment, and wouldn't you know that is when my computer would decide to start running at snail's pace? And for what reason? Who knows, just because it can.
And--Sorry, my television is also on and I just saw a commercial for mac and cheese. I completely forgot all about whatever it is that is bothering me. Um...Oh, yeah. Computer is a cunt and I shall one day see it in hell.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Daily Celeb Birthday
March 27:
Quentin Tarantino
Really, I can not justify how much I love this man. He is in my top three favorite directors (Quentin Tarantino, Tim Burton and Troy Duffy) and most of his movies sit on my top ten favorite movie list. Oh, and that picture above is from one of my favorite movies From Dusk Till Dawn, in which I thought he was sooooo sexy, and my friends were immediately disgusted.
Also, I should take a moment to point out, that of my top five favorite movies (The Boondock Saints, Fanboys, Shaun of the Dead, Clerks 2 and From Dusk Till Dawn) two out of five have gotten AWFUL reviews. If you look at my top 25, there are probably twelve more movies that have gotten shitty reviews. And, it isn't as though I like "shitty" movies. I think the people who review these movies either are NOT fans, and should be shot, or simply "do not get it."
So happy
I really can not express how happy it makes me that I was able to write today. To me, there is no worse feeling in the entire world than when I have an idea in my head, but simply can not get it down on paper. Or rather, can not get it typed into Word. It is the same relief that comes when a headache finally begins to ebb, or when that stubbed toe suddenly stops feeling as though your entire foot is being gnawed off by wolves.
Sadly, all my work is SHIT and will not be read by anyone other than my friends, and them by force. See, I don't get Pulitzer prize ideas or story lines in my head. No, see, today I finally figured out how I could link a dead, zombified John Goodman into my Nicolas Cage/Keanu Reeves vampire saga. You won't exactly be seeing that mainstream anytime soon.
Sometimes when I think of all the time and effort I have put into these stories (count is up to four), I begin to get that nervous feeling and think, "Did I waste too much time on something that will never amount to anything?" It was the same question I had to ask myself when I invested a lot of time and obsession into some guy I liked, only to finally realize it was hopeless. He I will admit defeat over, these stories, though, these are my creative babies. So while I am wasting quite a bit of time on stories that I find quite funny, but other people might deem offensive and horrific, I still hold out hope that one day they will get the appreciation they deserve. I keep imagining some sort of contest that requests the most fucked up story, or the most random story, something along those lines, and I submit it and it gets read and I get sued by Nicolas Cage and Keanu Reeves.
Really, it's all part of my master plan to meet Judge Reinhold.
Sadly, all my work is SHIT and will not be read by anyone other than my friends, and them by force. See, I don't get Pulitzer prize ideas or story lines in my head. No, see, today I finally figured out how I could link a dead, zombified John Goodman into my Nicolas Cage/Keanu Reeves vampire saga. You won't exactly be seeing that mainstream anytime soon.
Sometimes when I think of all the time and effort I have put into these stories (count is up to four), I begin to get that nervous feeling and think, "Did I waste too much time on something that will never amount to anything?" It was the same question I had to ask myself when I invested a lot of time and obsession into some guy I liked, only to finally realize it was hopeless. He I will admit defeat over, these stories, though, these are my creative babies. So while I am wasting quite a bit of time on stories that I find quite funny, but other people might deem offensive and horrific, I still hold out hope that one day they will get the appreciation they deserve. I keep imagining some sort of contest that requests the most fucked up story, or the most random story, something along those lines, and I submit it and it gets read and I get sued by Nicolas Cage and Keanu Reeves.
Really, it's all part of my master plan to meet Judge Reinhold.
Friday, March 26, 2010
She is my hero
Seriously, I am so fucking excited for this show to come back next month. Sue Sylvester is my hero. I luhhhhh.
If you are not watching Glee then there is something wrong with you. I demand that, along with Boondock Saints, you start actively trying to watch every single episode before it comes back next month.
If you are not watching Glee then there is something wrong with you. I demand that, along with Boondock Saints, you start actively trying to watch every single episode before it comes back next month.
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Overheard in class
Behind me in my lit class yesterday I heard a girl behind me saying, "Why do there have to be smart people and stupid people? Why can't everyone just be smart like us?" She sighed and then said, "Stupid people should have to carry cards, or something."
I merely met her question with a roll of my eyes and, just before class started, she said, "Wait...If today is Wednesday then what is tomorrow?"
I had to restrain myself from turning around and saying, "Congratulations, your card comes in on THURSDAY, you know, the day after Wednesday."
Oh, and to answer your question, there are stupid people so people like me can feel superior to people like you. And I take great pride in the fact that I may not be a lot of things, but smarter than the dumb slut in back of me is one of them. And that I am a person who can get twelve Oreos in her mouth at once. So, smarter than that slutty girl and Oreos. I think there's bragging rights somewhere in there!
I merely met her question with a roll of my eyes and, just before class started, she said, "Wait...If today is Wednesday then what is tomorrow?"
I had to restrain myself from turning around and saying, "Congratulations, your card comes in on THURSDAY, you know, the day after Wednesday."
Oh, and to answer your question, there are stupid people so people like me can feel superior to people like you. And I take great pride in the fact that I may not be a lot of things, but smarter than the dumb slut in back of me is one of them. And that I am a person who can get twelve Oreos in her mouth at once. So, smarter than that slutty girl and Oreos. I think there's bragging rights somewhere in there!
One of Life's Truths
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
And the winner is...
I believe that the day I have had could be classified under "epic." Let me explain.
My 930 class was canceled this morning so I got to sleep in. There were two episodes of Supernatural on TNT (which is a guilty pleasure for me.) I found a book that I thought I had lost and would have to replace. I got dressed for the day and boobs looked FANTASTIC in my top. In my 1230 class I got my favorite flavor of Tootsie roll pop thrown at me when I answered a question correct. When I got back to my dorm to begin a huge project that was due at 5, and which I had forgotten all about, I opened my email to see an email from my professor in said 5 o'clock class. Class was canceled. Then, on the way home from school, I passed four cops on separate parts of the highway, each time going at least 10+ miles over the speed limit. I didn't get pulled over. Finally, when I got home, my mother managed to save a brownie (that night's dessert) for me. It had swirls of peanut butter in the middle. My favorite.
Oh, yes. It's been a good day. I can't wait to see what happens to make my regret saying so...
My 930 class was canceled this morning so I got to sleep in. There were two episodes of Supernatural on TNT (which is a guilty pleasure for me.) I found a book that I thought I had lost and would have to replace. I got dressed for the day and boobs looked FANTASTIC in my top. In my 1230 class I got my favorite flavor of Tootsie roll pop thrown at me when I answered a question correct. When I got back to my dorm to begin a huge project that was due at 5, and which I had forgotten all about, I opened my email to see an email from my professor in said 5 o'clock class. Class was canceled. Then, on the way home from school, I passed four cops on separate parts of the highway, each time going at least 10+ miles over the speed limit. I didn't get pulled over. Finally, when I got home, my mother managed to save a brownie (that night's dessert) for me. It had swirls of peanut butter in the middle. My favorite.
Oh, yes. It's been a good day. I can't wait to see what happens to make my regret saying so...
One of Life's Truths
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
One of Life's Truths
Um, okay
Don't know if I actually have to say this, but: If you haven't seen the Boondock Saints, I demand you immediately go out and do so. You will thank me later, because it is seriously the best movie ever made.
Monday, March 22, 2010
One of Life's Truths
Daily Celeb Birthday
There will be no Celebrity Birthday today. You have Reese Witherspoon to blame for it. And everyone, including William Shatner, will suffer from it.
Sunday, March 21, 2010
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